Who am I ???

The believers must (eventually) win through,- Those who humble themselves in their prayers; Who avoid vain talk; Who are active in deeds of charity; Who abstain from sex, Except with those joined to them in the marriage bond, or (the captives) whom their right hands possess,- for (in their case) they are free from blame, The believers verse 1-6.

Now, tho sun make day sunning. And water limiting, and trees down drying, and animal out hunting and mankind???
Which one am I? Which one that I? Which should I be? Or there a one that I am being. So la fey,, Sybilla...Thou sun or tho Above The Sunny who own sun, who own water, who own trees and who own food? See in me O me Sybilla.. I am that one who received the orde' come to king of mother. Eventhough, there is much argued but He know whatever thee do not know.

Thenlater, I am a king of mother, who shall perform my orde executed the orde come to eyes off the Mother and motherchild. Day to day. Time by time until the Day and the Time. By that, the orde gone out from the meat through eyes. who looks on beauty of mother. Been cheated. Ah! pesona non grata.

And time, time, time and day, day, day loose out and the meat lose faith and the eyes see nothing than fake.... and the fake that make mother look better even mother so older and the mother dying while waiting but the fake cheat on the eyes that mother still beauty lady in red. and tho Red that make mother look beauty,,, Ah me love sybilla! broadways......

Now, tho sun that sunning had made me up. Giving new light to those eyes. Awoke from forgotten. Awake from blindnesses. Shall i presume king ??O me Sybilla.. Shall i presume the Orde?? O sybilla Shall I open the door?? Sybilla. Wake up and free thou u mankind. from this deep dark dungeon that your eyes cant see. Look upon the mother and the Sun that giving Light........ Hope you can see...........

When The Order Has Come

Who believe in the Unseen, are steadfast in prayer, and spend out of what We have provided for them;{al-Baqarah} verse 3.

Sybilla....Though for you baby to understand the verse. But nor parent neither me to understand. Thou you baby that i keep in faith. To spread the verse. In its true content and practise. A key of beginning your journey. The key for you to excel afterward and key for you in this blind humanity to open the door. The door that contain light. And the eyes of blindness reopen. By the verse. And this is it, the faith I put on you.

My baby Sybilla.....I put on you, an Order that you might be rejected. I put on you an order that hard for you to run it. I put on you an order to make you believe The what i believe. I put on you an order to describe the blind of humanity and the human that can see it.. I put on you to spread, to speak to reach, to understand and to let people understand the Order that has come. To me, to You. And baby me, trust is the word for me to keep this fire burn alive. Even in the small breath. But trust had made it keep breathing....

Breathing by the breath of you... Passion, Determine, Soul, Effort and Gain may be together plant in your dark meat chest. And i know because I am the person who planted it. Make me baby smile all the ways of my life by seeing you make it.. By you beautiful lips. And the braveheart you had. To fullfill the Order. To execute the Order, To spread the Order because i already Failed...... Your Love.....

The sign of my journey

Sybilla question,,,

Papa, please tell me something i want to know? How do i been created? When it is? Papa, tell me how it happen? What should I do in this life? What u want me to be? What I should be? How long it should be? And Papa can u tell me? The propose and the meaning of this breath.

Papa answer...

Dewiku Sybilla, persoalan- persoalan dalam mindamu. Jawapan ada pada matamu yang jernih. Yang masih dilitupi hijab nista. Namun, disuatu masa pasti akan terbuka dan ia cuba mengeruhkan hatimu, pada soalan2mu, mengalpa dan meleka. Yang akan membunuh hatiku jikakau terpedaya. Papa cuma mau kau tahu, ini satu perjalanan jauh. Yang akan kau tempuhi melewati usia-usia.`Usia dan Masa'.

Sybilla,, O 'please my dear mama.. Should i be alone in this journey? Without u and papa beside me? and not you who feed me? What should i eat? Drink? How can I walk?

Mama,,,,

O cintaku Sybilla,, mama dan papamu ada disisi. Menemanimu tiap saat berlalu. Menyusukanmu sepenuh hatiku, dan cinta yang akan ku curah padamu, buat bekal, buat ingatan, buat sempadan. Namun mata kami terbatas penglihatannya. Dan akan jauh meninggalkanmu lewat usia dan masa. Lalu, aku hanya redha menyerahkanmu pada 'Dia' yang lebih dekat padamu dari diriku. Dia di urat merihmu. Dia akan menemanimu. Dia akan jadi teman rayuanmu. Teman tangis dan sendamu. Yang memandumu dalam perjalanan ini yang hanya ada dua. `Lurus atau Berliku'.

Sybilla,,, O mama O papa,, I'm scared. So scared. Should I continue this journey. Or should I stop and wait for both of you. Wait and waiting until, dears you will find me. I dont know what have I to. And do.


Papa and Mama,, Sybilla my love. A choice is only a choice. But there, there is chances. Chances that you should go and try to grab it. The chances that your beautiful eyes might see as `Sign'. sign to continue. Sign for you. And we might be far further. Keep waiting and waits 'till u are here together. Reaching our hand and hot in our warmly hugs. Miss and missing. You in front of the `Light'......

An Opening

My appreciatness to Mighty Allah.. for allowing me become a pretty human being. For allowing me to be a luvly daughter to this gracious papa n mama.. For chance He giving me to continue in this journey.. I pray for my safety, appreciation, inspire, and fate to be on me on this journey. And last not least, for papa n mama, thank you for this meaningful life you brougt to me..Please do not give up in the challenges that both of u will face along together to make me understand..I had this dream and i know it is become true..